There is a difference between who you are and what you do. It’s easier to identify with what you do. It’s not uncommon to be asked, “What do you do?” in conversation. It’s a common curiosity. We focus so intently on what we do since our performance often dictates our rewards in life – whether those rewards are monetary or otherwise. Our actions often determine our reward. Our line of work has great influence on how we identify ourselves. But, who you ARE is so much more important than what you do.

Our passion lies deep in who we are, not what we do.

— Simon Sinek (@simonsinek) April 8, 2022

Simon Sinek recently tweeted “Our passion lies deep in who we are, not what we do.” What we do is an expression of who we are. What we do is a small part of a greater, far more complex system of who we are. Included in our “who” are what we do, our passions, our fears, our confidence, our perceptions, our inclinations, and even more. Our passions truly lie deep within who we are, and they are hopefully well-expressed through our actions – through what we do.

This is not to say that we can look at what we do and then get a complete idea of who we are. We might act in ways that may be inconsistent with who we are. We may act a particular way out of obligation, pressure, or circumstance. We may act a particular way for any number of reasons. By stating “our passions are hopefully well-expressed through our actions” assumes the conditions, whether internal or external (or both), that cause or allow us to act that way – with intent.

When we over identify with what we do though, we see successes and failures as a reflection of who we are. Successes and failures may be the result of any number of factors. These might include effort (whether inadequate, complete, inconsistent, consistent, etc.), or the decisions of others, which we can’t control. Any number of factors contribute to our successes and failures in life, but they are not a reflection of who you are. While it’s easy to use these successes and failures as measurements, they don’t measure who you are. They may (or may not) be great measurements for what you do or what you need to do. However, they do not measure who we are.

In fact, measurements of success are actually based on accomplishment of effective objectives. To truly measure success, we need well-defined objectives from which success can be measured. So, to really measure success accurately, you would have needed to have done the work of establishing effective objectives from which to measure success. This is certainly not something that you should tie your self-worth to. Creating effective objectives, and then measuring our progress or accomplishment on those objectives certainly lies within the realm of “what you do”.

You will succeed, and you will fail. Those are not reflections of who you are. You start to get closer to who you are when you learn from your successes and failures. What have you learned from your past successes and failures? How have you internalized those things? What have you done as a result of those things that you’ve learned? It’s not the success or the failure that defines you. When you learn from them and internalize them because of who you are, and then act again in accordance with those lessons, who you are starts to better affect what you do.

So then, who are we? Who are you?

That’s a journey that you have to take. There’s no singular path to discovering that, but there are some strategies that can help you get there. They include putting down the phone, journaling, asking “why?” being purposeful, playing, and meditating.

So, go and work hard. Strive for success, but always be aware that what you do does not define who you are, because who you are is so much more important than what you do. Whether things work out in your favor, or whether they don’t – remember that it’s who you are that matters most.